newborn pics + blessing (picture overrrload)

A few weeks ago, we had our friend Harmony take some newborn(ish) pictures of Cros. She did an amazing job! Everyone needs a photographer friend. I know I'll look back on these pictures in a few years and just die all over again.

We also had Crosby's blessing a couple weeks ago. We decided to do it at my parents house and invite family and a few friends. It. was. perfect. Mathis' parents are on a mission in Vermont, and their mission president let them fly in to be here. They left for their mission three days before Cros was born!

I wanted to do a few decorations, but nothing too extreme.

Believe it or not, there were 21 guys in this circle! Crosby is pretty popular

over pictures

This was such a special day! Mathis gave an amazing blessing. I am so lucky to be his wife.

Words cannot express my gratitude for this little guy. After having a miscarriage, I just realize how blessed I am to be a mom. That was one of the hardest times in my life. I felt like I was in some sort of fog and I couldn't escape it. But, Crosby has brought so much joy into our lives. He was totally worth the wait!!

meet crosby //

He's finally here! Crosby Mathis Harman was born on February 12.... weighing in at 6.15, and measuring 19.5 inches. He is just the sweetest, yummiest babe.

On Tuesday, at my 39 week appointment, I went in to see my doctor. My last 2 visits I had had some high blood pressure, and just the worst headaches. They tested me the week before to see if I had preeclampsia. Luckily, I didn't. My doctor saw me and said, let's just do this! He told me to go get something to eat, get my stuff and head over to the hospital. He told me this baby would be here tomorrow!

Knowing when the baby was coming was sooo nice! Mathis and I went and ate, my sister in-laws came over and did my nails, I showered, and got ready. <<How perfect. I was sooo worried my water would break in front of my students. I can only imagine what they would have said.

We got to the hospital and they started <<inserting>> these pills that would soften my cervix. I started having contractions a few hours later. By morning they were really bad! I got my epidural (miracle drug.. i don't know how anyone does it naturally!) and the doctor came in and broke my water. The rest of the afternoon was just a waiting game.

At around 7, the nurse checked me and i was completely dilated. She said let's do a practice push before the doctor gets here.. Um, I thought he was going to just fall out of me. She ran to get my doctor, because cros was so ready to get here. 

Not knowing if we were having a boy or girl was so fun! Every nurse was just as excited as we were I think. My entire family had taken bets on the gender, and the weight. Mathis and I for sure thought we were having a girl. Well, the doctor got there.. I pushed like 7 times, and he was here! He came out face down, so the doctor waited a second to flip him over. The anticipation was just about killing everyone in that room. When he flipped him over, I was completely shocked! I guess I don't have a very good motherly intuition because I was like 90% sure it was a girl.

That day was one of the best days of my life! I still cry when I think about it. I could never have imagined how much love I could feel for this tiny human instantly. I am beyond obsessed with my little guy. Even though the recovery was (is) awful, and nights are long, I could never ask for anything more.

Cros turned 1month old yesterday! How can 1 month of pregnancy feel like a year, but 1 month of him being here feels like 1 minute?

I am absolutely smitten with this boy!!

baby baby

well, I've made it to 34 weeks! As my stomach keeps growing, and my back pain is almost intolerable, I feel like all i'm thinking about is when this little babe will be here. I wish these six weeks would fly by... but at the same time, my to-do list is never ending!!

 I'm getting sooo anxious to find out if this little babe will be a he, or a she, and who s/he'll look like!

nearly human

I think when people say they have all this energy during the 2nd trimester, they must be lying... right? Maybe it's because I'm with 25 six year olds all day, but when I get home from work, I am SO exhausted. All I want to do is get into bed and go to sleep. I wish I knew the secrets to getting some of that 2nd tri energy.

But, last weekend was fall break.... which means I only had a three-day work week. I felt nearly human the whole weekend. I actually had some energy-- I did things normal people do. I went to the gym, temple date, made dinner for my husband (which is rare and far between), I made a two layer apple spice cake from scratch (thanks martha)... no really! I just kept saying, "is this what normal people feel like? " I think i could get used to it.

I guess until Thanksgiving break... I'll become a zombie again.

so lucky

well, I finally announced that I'm pregnant! I am beyond lucky, and feel so blessed. While I am completely overjoyed, I still feel a little hesitant to write about my pregnancy, because I know there are so many women out there struggling to start a family. When I wrote my last post about my miscarriage, I received so many texts and emails from a lot of women sharing their struggle with me. Thank you for your kind and encouraging words!
  It truly just sucks... yeah, sucks. I can't think of a better word to describe the situation.  My heart goes out to you, and I am praying and hoping for you all daily.

So, I am about 22 weeks along. I'm due February 19. Once I hit 20 weeks I was so excited to be halfway there... but at the same time, I have how much longerrrrr? Mathis and I have decided to wait until the baby is born to find out the sex. I know, I know.. we're crazy. Everyone has their opinion on why this is a good or terrible idea. And I honestly welcome your opinions, although I'm not going to change my mind (hopefully :)). For now, I call the baby a she, and Mathis says he. Talk about gender confusion ha.

I have been able to feel the baby kick since about week 17, and Mathis has been able to feel her since week 18. I know this is early, but maybe the baby is just super close to my skin or something. Being able to SEE the baby move is the weirdest/most amazing thing in the world.

I feel like I took this picture soooooo long ago! Soo happy!

 

 *I know I look pretty haggered in this picture.. i just got back from the gym.** 

I've decided going to the gym pregnant makes you feel EXTRA pregnant!

I still can't believe this is real.
xoxo